The scene was Friday October 26th, around 11PM - in my 5th Ave apartment building - Mommy got "stircrazy" and decided to make some chocolate chip cookies. In the weeks leading up to this point, occasional Braxton-Hicks contractions hampered Mom's ability to do much of anything, but they were far enough between that it was a certainty my arrival was some time away... that changed.
Immediately after plopping down on the sofa, with the smell of cookies in the air, Mom looked over to Dad with a look he wasnt soon to forget ... her tummy hurt, and this time, it was for real... a bathroom stop and some "show" later, they knew that I was prepped and ready to rock.
Daddy - certain that they had some time left before needing to rush to the hospital - emplored Mommy to take it easy, relax and attempt to get some sleep... it was sure to be the last night they'd get some for a long while.
Try as she might, Mom just could not sleep... in fact, she was so anxious/uptight about my pending arrival, at 4AM on Saturday morning, she felt it appropriate to wake up and disappear into the bathroom for a full hour ... her goal? Why to do her hair and makeup, of course! How could she have been expected to visit the hospital without those natural curls straightened and eye-shadow applied?!?!
Dad wouldnt budge - he continued to maintain that her discomfort wasnt too far out of the ordinary, and certainly did not merit a hospital trip ... 6 hours later, he was proven wrong.
Contractions went from sporadic to rhythmic, and were about 6 minutes apart by 1030AM... so, off to Lenox Hill we went...
For the first time in the pregnancy, Daddy was anxious... normally calm and collected, he felt his stomach move up to his throat as they left the apartment for what was assumed to be their last time as a couple - returning next, as a family... Gulp!
The hospital was a surreal experience - total silence and no one in a rush to do anything. Strangely, within the refuge came a sense of security ... nothing could go wrong now - we're in excellent care, and both Mommy and I were in good health and progressing nicely.
Around the corner came our Angel - Ellen Saposnick - Elle (pronounced "El-E") for short. In preparation for my arrival, Mom and Dad had completed a 10-hour Lamaze Breathing training course ... Elle, whom was the Head of Delivery Nurses at Lenox Hill, was our instructor, and as luck would have it, she was in that day. Elle had been in her position at Lenox Hill for upwards of 30 years, and had successfully delivered over 9,000 babies. Suffice it to say - she was thrilled to see us - and vice versa. We truly were in good hands.
Elle, Mommy (I think) and I!
Then - the bad news ... upon examination, Mommy was only 2.5 centemeters dilated ... and when asked by the attending resident, "how do you feel - pain wise - 1 being the best, 10 being the worst?," her response...?
"Eh, i'd say it's a 3 - my stomach is kinda 'tight' ..."
Daddy's jaw dropped ... all that drama for "tight?!?!" He muttered under his breath ... "If I know anything about labor pain - it's that those who have gone through it before have NEVER described the sensation simply as 'eh, a 3, it's kinda tight'."
Elle turned to Mommy and Daddy, and said simply, "you're still pretty early ... if I had to guess, you're going to deliver after midnight tonight ... if comfort is your concern, I'd go home for a few hours ... get a meal, take a shower, and relax. Things will come soon enough."
Reluctantly, Mom and Dad agreed - they packed up the "hospital bag" and trudged on home.
Knowing that the hospital would forbid food intake once she was admitted, Mommy was quick to act upon walking through a front door ... her order? In a city widely recognized as being the, "Pizza Capital of the World," she jumped online and ordered from 1-800-Dominos. Dominos friggin' pizza! Blasphemous (but tasty given our other options in the Murray Hill area of Manhattan)!
Pizza gone - it was time to relax (if that was even possible). A hot shower for Mom and and stiff drink for Dad were in order. Their excitement was building knowing that within a few hours I'd be officially a member of the Erm clan.
Speaking of the Erm clan, Daddy's Mom, "Honey," and his sister Larisa arrived in NYC. Earlier in the day, after learning of our trip to the hospital, their fervor could not be quashed and a 3.5 hr drive was quickly organized. They came to visit us at home for a brief while - to share their best wishes and support. It was a nice respite in an otherwise timultuous day.
Within an hour of their departure, I decided it was time to kick this birthing thing into high gear... my contractions began in earnest again, and Mommy was writhing around on the bed in agony. It was time to return to the hospital to get this birthin' thing going.
After having to sneak into the hospital through the emergency entrance (after hours), we were greated in the Labor & Delivery department by our night nurse, Khadeishja. She was a jolly, overly friendly/warm woman who was wonderfully calming. One glance at Mommy's pained faced, and she knew that an IV was necessary. For two reasons really; One, Mommy needed to be hydrarated if at some point she elected to go the epidural route, and, Two, Demerol was sure to be our first pain treatment, and the fastest way to deliver the medicine was via IV.
Mommy hates needles, and it was at this moment that she was probably the most apprehensive about her predicament over the entire course of our hospital stay. Thankfully, the IV was a quick and painless event and shortly thereafter, Mommy was fast on her way to LaLa-Land.
Demerol is a wonderful pain killer ... within 30 seconds of it's adminstration, Mommy was on Cloud 9. Her eyes widened and her favorite word became a slurred, "Whoo-oa". She repeatedly muttered to Daddy "... don't leave me, I need you to help me ... please don't leave me," as if Daddy had some place better to be. After constantly assuring her that his brief leaving the room was solely to speak with the nurses about her condition - Mommy for the first time in 24 hours had some genuine pain relief and a calm befell her. She was high as a kite.
Then Daddy met the Cookie Monsters.
The nightstaff at the nursing station were admittedly famished, and Daddy's ingenious plan worked to perfection... as he was walking out of our apartment door for the return visit to the hospital, Dad glanced at the Chocolate Chip cookies Mommy had concocted the prior evening when she went into labor... "Why waste perfectly good cookies?," he thought, and into the bag they went. Within minutes of offering the cookies to the night nurses, they were showering praise upon both Mommy's culinary capabilities, but also started offering Daddy, "unlimited invitations to give birth at Lenox Hill again." A whole batch of 50 cookies lasted no longer than 2 hours ... chocolate and women ...
Then came Daddy's "reclining chair." Manufactured in China, by the Chinese, for the Chinese, suffice it so say, Daddy didn't quite fit into this seating option. There have been several instances in life where Daddy felt like Gulliver and his dealings with the Liliputions... this was most certainly one of them. Any semblance of "rest," was clearly not going to befall GullivErm this night.
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For months, the "Epidural" discussion was held in private between Mommy and Daddy. Having successfully completed the San Diego Marathon, Mommy was adamant that she could handle any and all pain associated with childbirth. "If know what real pain is," she confidently said with authority, as she remained confident that, like her mother before her, natural childbirth was in the cards for her.
At 2AM that morning - Mommy decided she'd had enough. With my head already at "Station +1" (translation - my head was already one centimeter beyond the narrowest portion of the birth canal), and yet a dilation spread of only four centimeters, every contraction sent Mommy into excruciating pain... my head simply had nowhere to go! Even Demerol failed to help her overcome these labor pains, and the anaesthesiaologist was called. Mommy had given it a truly nobel effort, but it was clear that some genuine pain relief was going to be necessary for me to finish this 10-month journey.
Arthur Charles Clarke once said, "Sufficiently advanced technology is indistinguishable from magic." Consider an Epidural, this brand of "magic." Within two minutes of the Epidural procedure being performed, Mommy was blessed with the magic relief of all lower body pain she was looking for. For the first time, she could rest. The wonders of science had provided Mommy not only the ability to continue on with labor pain free, but also the prospect of getting some much needed sleep in advance of the birthing hour. Mom sank into a deep sleep around 230am, knowing that within the next few hours, I would join her as the next female Ermanis.
Around 530am, Mom woke to a unfamiliar warmth in her bed and between her legs ... Pop! My water broke! The final sign that I was making my final approach on the landing strip of life. Still pain free, and with her contractions shortening to 3 or 4 minutes apart, she was now 7 centimeters dilated, and even my head could be seen/felt on the cusp of the world.
The Final Countdown began around 8am, when guess who walked into Mommy's room... Elle! She was back for her Sunday shift, and the news got even better ... she was slated to spend the whole of the day taking care of Mommy! Her grin was cheek to cheek upon learning of Mommy's progression, and Elle's words of wisdom and encouragement empowered her. She was ready to have me!
Not more than an hour later, the ten centimeter point had been reached, and Elle called for Doctor Levin. Our OBGYN was not available for deliveries that weekend, so Dr. Levin filled her shoes as he was a part of her practice. Immediately, Mommy and Daddy thought back to their Lamaze training, and started to prepare for the pushing process.
Hi Dr. Levin!
At 9am, a substantial contraction began - Mommy took a deep breath, and pushed for what looked to Daddy to cover a period of two whole minutes. After this first push, it was clear I was going to be an eager and active participant in my own birth. Not only was I one the cusp of birth, but my head was already showing itself to all parties in the room outside of Mommy.
5 contractions, and 5 professionally executed pushes later - out popped my head! Daddy says that this moment will forever remain etched in his memory. Though I could still not breath on my own at this point, I decided to open my eyes and check out my surroundings - even while the remaining portion of my body remained inside Mommy. I liked what I saw, and decided to get the show on the road. Mommy pushed one more time, and WHOOSH!, out slid the rest of my body.
Like a squeezed sponge being allowed to relax/absorb the air, my lungs filled with their first breath, and I decided to start trying out my singing voice!
Wriggling, screaming, flailing my arms and legs, I was placed on Mommy's chest, while Elle toweled my down and wrapped my first blankie around me. The finishing touch was my first knit cap. Daddy and Mommy looked at each other, tears rolling down their cheeks, and affirmed their forever love for each other… The Ermanis Family had officially started, and in front of them was ‘lil ole me! The magic of a face – my face – brought unfathomable joy to both of their hearts. Their lives would never be the same, and their excitement was boundless.
Elle was able to snap some photos of me with Mommy and Daddy within my first 5 minutes of life – they are truly great snaps. What follows are the photos from my first day livin’ on my own. Thanks so much for reading my story!
"Chillin' Out, Maxin', Relaxin', All Cool ..."
Got Your Finger Daddy! Look At How Chubby I Am!
Larisa (We-Tawd!) giving me a hug and a smile!
I really do look like a glowworm!
Honey's Got Me!
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